Peter De Vries

"The concept of two people living together for 25 years without a serious dispute suggests a lack of spirit only to be admired in sheep."

A. P. Herbert

"The difficulty with marriage is that we fall in love with a personality, but must live with a character."

Peter De Vries

"The human brain starts working the moment you are born and never stops until you stand up to speak in public."

George Jessel

"The husband who doesn't tell his wife everything probably reasons that what she doesn't know won't hurt him."

Leo J. Burke

"The majority of husbands remind me of an orangutan trying to play the violin."

Honore de Balzac

"The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret."

Henry Youngman

"The Wedding March always reminds me of the music played when soldiers go into battle."

Heinrich Heine

"When a girl marries, she exchanges the attentions of many men for the inattention of one."

Helen Rowland

"When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife."

Prince Philip

"When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her."

Sacha Guitry

"Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits and then complain that he's not the man she married?"

Barbra Streisand

"You do live longer with bran, but you spend the last fifteen years on the toilet."

Alan King